Monday 22 February 2010

Innocent Civilians

Innocent civilians seem to get killed an awful lot. They're rather like vivacious people, who only ever appear in obituaries. There's that strange rule of adjectives that they tend to imply that their nouns usually aren't usually so: vide Graham Greene's The Quiet American.

I'm no expert on foreign policy, but wouldn't it be a good idea to invade a country where all the civilians are guilty? Aside from the Swiss Guard the Vatican State is practically undefended and they have no serious air-cover aside from the occasional cardinal's hat. They would look up from their maudlin and guilty musings, see the Predator Drone, and know that God was giving them exactly what their sins deserved.

I merely assume that the ever-present adjective "innocent" is there to serve a purpose. Alternatively we could carpet bomb penal colonies.

Your fault for coveting, Pontiff.

P.S. I once went on a date with an lady arms dealer who told me that cruise missiles are actually able to hover in front of their targets, which is kind of freaky. 


  1. Elderly pensioners annoy the hell out of me.

  2. Since I was a young child my usual habit has been to avoid unnecessary tautologies.

  3. ‘Black Boy,’ she read, ‘in the four o’clock at Brighton,’ and thought tenderly and proudly, ‘That was his tip. He’s a fellow who knows things,’ and prepared patiently and happily to wait for him to return. She was a sticker. A clock away in the town struck half-past one.