I can't be bothered today. Sorry, but that's just how it is. I'm not your slave, you know. You can't go round treating a chap like a beast of burden. I have a lot of important things to drink. If you really must read something, I recommend that you have a look at this splendid little post on the use of the word hirquitalliency in seventeenth century erotica.
It's vital and important information.
P.S. Thanks to the Antipodean for this.