Thursday, 7 November 2013

The Elements of Eloquence is Here

Go, litel book.

The Elements of Eloquence is officially released in Britain today. Would you like to read it? No? Oh. Well, if you change your mind, dear reader, there is a widget just to the right. Do you see it? The lovely green and gold cover. Click on that and you can read the first 34 pages for nothing. Then, if you think page 35 worth it, you can dash out the door and run whooping to the nearest bookshop and get yourself a copy of the real thing in all its hardbound glory.

Or, if the notion of running to the bookshop is too much for you, you can simply sit at your computer, sherry in one hand and mouse in the other, and order it from there people:

The Book Depository

Or, if you're a rugged traditionalist, you can confront me face to face, look me in the eye with one of your commanding stares, and tell me to give you a copy right now and sign it too. I'll probably capitulate, being a capitulatory sort of chap. The way to do this is to come along to one of these places:

West End Lane books in London on 14th of November
Taunton Literary Festival on 18th of November
The Hungerford Bookshop on 19th of November
Barter Books in Alnwick on 25th of November
The Edinburgh Bookshop on 26th of November
Rossiter Books in Ross-on-Wye on the 27th of November
Booka Bookshop in Oswestry on 28th of November
Blackwells Oxford on 9th of December
Steyning Bookshop in West Sussex on 10th of December
Warwick Books on 11th of December

Or you can just come to the launch party in London on the 12th. But to do that you have to enter a raffle. You do this using the widget below. I think. I'm new to all this, you understand. You give them your name and at midnight on Monday it's picked out of an electronic hat. Something like that anyway.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

And finally, if you're still wondering what it's all about, here's a silly chap with a silly voice to explain.

Do you see the tankards on the window-sill? They're antique.

Oh, and there'll be an interview with me in The Sunday Times, this Sunday, I think.


  1. No Birmingham event, doesn't surprise me after last year! Maybe I'll make it to Warwick, gives me an excuse to see the Meeting House too.

    The link for that event is broken by the way (takes you to the Oxford event). Here's the link, in case anyone else needs it:

  2. I just read the excerpt and I think it's brilliant!

  3. Hhhhhmmm. Me likey, me buyey

  4. started reading it last night and loving it so far.

  5. I love it. I knew I wanted it. I was then was seduced by the preview widget. By the end of page 34 I could not possibly wait for it to be shipped, so it became my first ever digital book. I have been having fun playing with the figures as I read. So far my best has been an antithesis: "What is dishonest in politics is a question of rhetoric. What is honest in politics is a rhetorical question." Thanks for the knowledge, thanks for the inspiration.

  6. You might want to include some links for your American readers. The UK Amazon store requires us to go to the USA Amazon store to buy the Kindle version.

    1. I'm afraid it's not out in America for a few months yet. The rights have been sold, though.

  7. Hello,

    I'm halfway through the book, and enjoying it immensely. I do have one very little gripe though: in Ch. 22, you say that zeugma "doesn't work awfully well in English", and suggest it’s covered more out of duty than anything else. Rather than simply asserting that I find that a tad unfair, I wanted to pass on my very favourite example of zeugma, in a rhyme from the end of the Tom Waits song The One That Got Away:

    I’ve lost my equilibrium, my car keys and my pride;
    The tattoo parlor’s warm, so I stumble there inside.